*** Jokes of the Day!! ***

by **pjfan31** » Thu Jan 26, 2012 4:50 pm

What's green and smells like bacon?

Kermits fingers

by **FenwayFaithful** » Thu Jan 26, 2012 8:11 pm

My girlfriend can't wrestle, but you should see her box

by **The Waiting Trophy Man** » Sat Feb 11, 2012 11:53 am

pjfan31 wrote:What's green and smells like bacon?

Kermits fingers

lol

by **not4uuu** » Sat Feb 11, 2012 6:54 pm

what do you call a dinosaur pig??

Jurassic Pork ...

:lol:

These 2 strips of bacon were cooking in a fryin pan, one says to the other "man, it's gettin hot" the other one says "OH MY GOD! TALKING BACON!!!! 8-)

by **pjfan31** » Sun Feb 12, 2012 3:55 pm

Why did the sperm cross the road?

Cause I wore the wrong socks

by **chelsea48** » Thu Feb 16, 2012 11:47 am

I used to date a Welsh girl who had 36DD`S............

......it was a ridiculously long name

by **Lizard** » Tue Feb 21, 2012 10:30 am

I was in a pub last night and saw two large girls by the bar.

They both had strange accents so I said "Hello Are you two girls from Scotland?"

One of them screamed... "Its WALES you f*cking idiot!"

So I immediately apologised and said " Sorry are you two whales from Scotland?"

by **davidtrios** » Wed Mar 14, 2012 7:23 am

How do you make a dead baby float?
First you get the ice cream, the Coke, the blender...

by **chelsea48** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 11:56 am

I was at the swimming pool today and decided to have a sneaky piss in the deep end. The life-guard must have noticed. He blew his whistle so fucking loud i nearly fell in!!!

by 81 » Fri May 04, 2012 12:23 pm

Renault and Ford have joined forces to create the perfect small car for women.

Mixing the Renault 'Clio' and the Ford 'Taurus' they have designed the 'Clitaurus'. It comes in pink, and the average male car thief won't be able to find it - let alone turn it on - even if someone tells him where it is and how to do it.

Rumor has it though, that it leaks transmission fluid once a month, and can be a real bitch to start in the morning! Some have reported that on cold winter mornings, when you really need it, you can't get it to turn over.

New models are initially fun to own, but very costly to maintain, and horribly expensive to get rid of. Used models may initially appear to have curb appeal and a low price, but eventually have an increased appetite for fuel, and the curb weight typically increases with age.

Manufacturers are baffled as to how the size of the trunk increases, but say that the paint may just make it LOOK bigger.

This model is not expected to reach collector status. Most owners find it is best to lease one, and replace it each year.

by **DS1119** » Fri May 04, 2012 12:32 pm

by **davidtrios** » Tue Oct 16, 2012 2:47 pm

During the last lockout, Bain Capital offered $4 billion for the entire NHL. Could they have run the league better than the owners?

They'd be playing in India.

by **pandora** » Wed Nov 21, 2012 8:46 am

by **SPEEDY MCCREADY** » Wed Nov 21, 2012 8:58 am

81 wrote:Renault and Ford have joined forces to create the perfect small car for women.

Mixing the Renault 'Clio' and the Ford 'Taurus' they have designed the 'Clitaurus'. It comes in pink, and the average male car thief won't be able to find it - let alone turn it on - even if someone tells him where it is and how to do it.

Rumor has it though, that it leaks transmission fluid once a month, and can be a real bitch to start in the morning! Some have reported that on cold winter mornings, when you really need it, you can't get it to turn over.

New models are initially fun to own, but very costly to maintain, and horribly expensive to get rid of. Used models may initially appear to have curb appeal and a low price, but eventually have an increased appetite for fuel, and the curb weight typically increases with age.

Manufacturers are baffled as to how the size of the trunk increases, but say that the paint may just make it LOOK bigger.

This model is not expected to reach collector status. Most owners find it is best to lease one, and replace it each year.