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I want to confess a real secret to you all

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I want to confess a real secret to you all

Postby Malcolm_X » Sat Nov 03, 2007 6:35 pm

I think I am a deeply lonely person.....I mean very, very lonely!!! And I have been this way I believe the majority of my life. Like I know a lot of people and I have friends, and people like me. I'm 24 and I've been on some dates, but never any real romantic ones....never had a girlfriend or anything like that......

But anyway, sometimes, and I haven't done this lately, but I call up phone sex lines....not for phone sex, but just because I want someone to talk to. You'd actually be surprised...most of these girls are in college, and its nice to just be able to open up to them. Most of them have told me that they can tell that I'm very lonely, and that I really need to tear down these walls that I build and let someone in....I dunno, I just wanted to get that off my chest.
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Postby acoustic guy » Sat Nov 03, 2007 6:42 pm

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.......................................Oh, you are serious huh?
Sorry.
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Sweep the Leg Johnny.
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Postby Malcolm_X » Sat Nov 03, 2007 6:45 pm

acoustic guy wrote:hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.......................................Oh, you are serious huh?
Sorry.



Yeah its really fuckin' funny thanks bud
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Postby acoustic guy » Sat Nov 03, 2007 6:50 pm

Malcolm_X wrote:Yeah its really fuckin' funny thanks bud


Auuuu come on. I am just kidding.
Sorry if I hurt your feelings.
Get em a Body Bag Yeeeeeaaaaa!
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Postby chadwick » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:10 pm

acoustic guy wrote:hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.......................................Oh, you are serious huh?
Sorry.


you are doing a good job at being the dickhead
hahahaha
nicely done @ being the prick
hahahaha

Sorry.
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Postby HOOKER » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:18 pm

I am sorry you feel that way. Check your PMs
Nice to know you.
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Postby justam » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:19 pm

Malcolm_X wrote:I think I am a deeply lonely person.....I mean very, very lonely!!! And I have been this way I believe the majority of my life. Like I know a lot of people and I have friends, and people like me. I'm 24 and I've been on some dates, but never any real romantic ones....never had a girlfriend or anything like that......

But anyway, sometimes, and I haven't done this lately, but I call up phone sex lines....not for phone sex, but just because I want someone to talk to. You'd actually be surprised...most of these girls are in college, and its nice to just be able to open up to them. Most of them have told me that they can tell that I'm very lonely, and that I really need to tear down these walls that I build and let someone in....I dunno, I just wanted to get that off my chest.


I think some people have more trouble connecting closely in average social situations and I think perhaps you are one of these people. Don't worry so much. You will eventually meet a few people you can connect with and you'll feel less lonely. Part of growing up is learning about how you need to move in the world to feel okay.

I don't think it's a great idea to call chat lines like this to relieve your loneliness because you may end up connecting your loneliness with guilt because they are phone sex lines.

It would probably be better to chat with people about other things (interests like music for example) to feel connected and then you won't mess up your ability to have a good love relationship. :)
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Postby Malcolm_X » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:22 pm

I don't really feel sorry for myself, I'm just stating the facts, that there are people in this world who wear masks, like I know a shit ton of people, and people like me, but they have no idea just how lonely I really am.


justam wrote:I think some people have more trouble connecting closely in average social situations and I think perhaps you are one of these people. Don't worry so much. You will eventually meet a few people you can connect with and you'll feel less lonely. Part of growing up is learning about how you need to move in the world to feel okay.

I don't think it's a great idea to call chat lines like this to relieve your loneliness because you may end up connecting your loneliness with guilt because they are phone sex lines.

It would probably be better to chat with people about other things (interests like music for example) to feel connected and then you wouldn't mess up your ability to have a good love relationship. :)
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Postby Ahnimus » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:23 pm

Malcolm_X wrote:I think I am a deeply lonely person.....I mean very, very lonely!!! And I have been this way I believe the majority of my life. Like I know a lot of people and I have friends, and people like me. I'm 24 and I've been on some dates, but never any real romantic ones....never had a girlfriend or anything like that......

But anyway, sometimes, and I haven't done this lately, but I call up phone sex lines....not for phone sex, but just because I want someone to talk to. You'd actually be surprised...most of these girls are in college, and its nice to just be able to open up to them. Most of them have told me that they can tell that I'm very lonely, and that I really need to tear down these walls that I build and let someone in....I dunno, I just wanted to get that off my chest.


Malcolm. Do you have anyone else in your life? Are you close with siblings, or parents, friends? Or is it romantic encounters you feel lacking in?

It sounds like the phone lines aren't satisfying. If they were, I'd recommend sticking with that, as full-time women can be difficult. ;)

It would help if I knew more about your situation. Do you have trouble with women?

I've spent most of my life without romantic partners. I've only had one serious relationship and it turned me off. But I still have a longing, like everyone else, and sometimes I have difficulty balancing my need for solitude with my need for a partner. The two conflict, and regardless of my situation, wether I'm alone or in a steady relationship, I always feel an absence of the other.

btw, when you get the bill for 5.99/min from Trinidad, that's the sex line. Most get routed through Trinidad, so they appear on phone bills as long distance calls to Trinidad. It'll save you a bit of embarassment if you don't call your provider.
I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
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Postby justjoshingu » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:26 pm

i'm sorry to hear that.

truth is, i was actually thinking of posting something similar.

i've been having these huge days where i feel opressed by anxiety and sadness. but i have too many people that need me to be me. need me to be the strong one. i am the one they come to for advice. i've already put a huge strain on my marriage. i'm tired of going to her how i feel so hopeless, because she has stuff to go thru that i want to be there for. i want to be someone strong and happy. i will have a logical thought of why things aren't as bad i feel, but the feeling is overwhelming. my biggest fear is that my went into depression and its gonna happen to me. the only hope i have is that my mom got relatively better by her late thirties. which means i only have to worry about it for the next few years.

most of this all comes down from my troubles in school and overwhelming debt from school . oh, and still about 99.99% of the people who know me have no idea that i'm not strong and happy 100% of the time.

so i can understand why you would call a stranger. the phone sex line people are still people. i've actually known people who worked them and they said that most guys just talked. about fears, desires hopes.

as for the dating part. the only thing i can say is this. i've had a date here and there. they usually didnt go as planned. i've fallen in love with friends i was close for, only to be told i wouldnt ever been seen by them in that light.
i dont know how i ever found anyone that would love me. and i will tell you a secret. I dont know if i deserve love, i dont know if i believe anyone (not even my wife) really loves me, and i know thats all stuff haunting me from my childhood. but i know in my brain she does. i know it happened when i stopped looking. i know that i get along with her and she makes me want to be a better person.

i dont think this was a very cheery happy post to help you along, but its one that i think is to let you know that you aren't alone. others feel like you do. nothing about your first post makes you odd or wierd.
mean people suck!
but nice people sw****w

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Postby justam » Sat Nov 03, 2007 7:36 pm

Malcolm_X wrote:I don't really feel sorry for myself, I'm just stating the facts, that there are people in this world who wear masks, like I know a shit ton of people, and people like me, but they have no idea just how lonely I really am.


I don't think you were feeling sorry for yourself. I'm just suggesting that perhaps it isn't a good idea to use phone sex lines as an outlet because it might mess up your ability to have a real relationship that could be something solid to help with the loneliness.
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Postby gue_barium » Sat Nov 03, 2007 8:05 pm

I don't think that sounds so strange. I don't even think it sounds particularly lonely. It sounds more like an alternative to... I'm not sure what. I knew a few guys during my service in the military who would hire prostitues just to spend time with a woman to talk to.
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Postby MahoganySouls » Sat Nov 03, 2007 8:17 pm

You mentioned "walls". It is quite intuitive that you can see that in yourself. The question is, why are you building them? Often times such a personality trait is the effect of an emotional upset in previous years. Have you experienced something in your life that has opened up this pattern in your life?
"When you're climbing to the top, you'd better know the way back down" MSB
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Postby gue_barium » Sat Nov 03, 2007 9:45 pm

MahoganySouls wrote:You mentioned "walls". It is quite intuitive that you can see that in yourself. The question is, why are you building them? Often times such a personality trait is the effect of an emotional upset in previous years. Have you experienced something in your life that has opened up this pattern in your life?


Maybe you should ask him to lie on the couch first...
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Postby The Champ » Sat Nov 03, 2007 9:50 pm

Listen, PM me, i'll tell you how to fuck some bitches..don't worry about it, you're young..
'I want to hurry home to you
put on a slow, dumb show for you
and crack you up
so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
god I'm very, very frightening
and I'll overdo it'
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