my older brother wants to get engaged ..

[GreenTeaDisease]

I whole heartedly disagree with this statement in a HUGE way. we each see things differently. while i respect your opinion, not everyone thinks like that.
jewelry has no practical use period - it doesn't dry clothes, cook dinner, etc. nor is it supposed to.

however, an engagement ring and wedding band is a SYMBOL of love. it is representative of a loving union between 2 people that can be handed down generation to generation.

i LOVE the fact that i have my mom's wedding band that my dad gave to her on their wedding day....a day i was not present (obviously) and my dad is no longer here. it is something i can have forever, that even remains once they are gone as a memory.

it is unfortunate that you only see it as part of a wardrobe, but many others do not. and if people have the $$, they have an absolute right to sepnd it as they please.

okay now that i just got all sappy i think i am going to go to the bathroom and puke

I get the *idea* of it being a symbol of love and all that. But Tiffany's doesn't care about that, DeBeers doesn't care about that. They care about obnoxious mark up. And one can only buy what they provide. If you went out and designed the ring yourself, that would be really cool. If you used stones that meant something to you other than DeBeers says you have to a have a diamond for your engagement ring...that would be different. I like the idea of airlooms (I have no idea how to spell that) but most people buy new rings for themselves.

when you just pay way too much for a ring that Tiffany's designed and DeBeers screwed over some Africans for, and you buy it based on the 4 C's, and you want it to cost a lot, and you buy it because that's just what done, it's stops being art, it stops having meaning. it stops being a "symbol of love." I just couldn't look at an overpriced commodity that some big corporation pumped out and think of it as representing my marriage. I think that would be really sad.

and there's a feminist issue with engagement rings as well, but I won't get into that.

[NY PJ1]

Somehow I don't believe that a crazy fucker with a gun and/or a knife intend to do anything for that rock will be deterred by her baseball credentials, especially if he or she is a Met fan....and my girl used to be a newspaper reporter and I still fear for her safety, even when she doesn't ..

that was a joke obviously ,, but u cant walk around life fearing things like that
and of course she would give it up,,thats why u get insurance on something like that

[NY PJ1]

I get the *idea* of it being a symbol of love and all that. But Tiffany's doesn't care about that, DeBeers doesn't care about that. They care about obnoxious mark up. And one can only buy what they provide. If you went out and designed the ring yourself, that would be really cool. If you used stones that meant something to you other than DeBeers says you have to a have a diamond for your engagement ring...that would be different. I like the idea of airlooms (I have no idea how to spell that) but most people buy new rings for themselves.

when you just pay way too much for a ring that Tiffany's designed and DeBeers screwed over some Africans for, and you buy it based on the 4 C's, and you want it to cost a lot, and you buy it because that's just what done, it's stops being art, it stops having meaning. it stops being a "symbol of love."

why anyone would go to those stores for rings is beyond me
u need to have a jeweler,but thats another topic

[The Champ]

Also, that'll be a nice chunk of change for her once they divorce ...

[NY PJ1]

Also, that'll be a nice chunk of change for her once they divorce ...

if that ever happens we take the ring back,,like the first time

[dunkman]

like my gf says "i dont care what it is" but i personally would never put a ring with a value of less than $7,500- 10,000 on her finger
and im broke
u want them to have something extra special imo

a nice shiny key to a new house would be extra special... and $10k would go a lot towards that.

it is all opinion but my wife would have died a death if i'd spent that on a ring.. she'd be thinking... "...its one wee ring... i could have had a leather sofa,plasma tv, bought him a new guitar, holiday in Turin, new carpets, a salon makeover and still have change for a nice ring that i'll lose down the toilet anyway..."

[GreenTeaDisease]

i
like my gf says "i dont care what it is" but i personally would never put a ring with a value of less than $7,500- 10,000 on her finger
and im broke
u want them to have something extra special imo

you've just summed up the entire problem! why should $$$$$$="extra special"?

[The Champ]

if that ever happens we take the ring back,,like the first time

Like the first time? And 'we.' I have visions of two big Italians 'getting' the ring back..haha....and I thought the chick only gives the ring back if the engagement is called off, not after marriage?

[edvedder913]

you've just summed up the entire problem! why should $$$$$$="extra special"?

because some girls do like big expensive diamonds. i suppose this one does.

[dunkman]

because some girls do like big expensive diamonds. i suppose this one does.

then those girls are as vacuous as Paris Hilton and them dumb fuckers.

[edvedder913]

then those girls are as vacuous as Paris Hilton and them dumb fuckers.

hey easy there - this is his future sister in law

[The Champ]

a nice shiny key to a new house would be extra special... and $10k would go a lot towards that.

it is all opinion but my wife would have died a death if i'd spent that on a ring.. she'd be thinking... "...its one wee ring... i could have had a leather sofa,plasma tv, bought him a new guitar, holiday in Turin, new carpets, a salon makeover and still have change for a nice ring that i'll lose down the toilet anyway..."

I hear you on this Dunk. Everyone is different, but personally my fiancee would cut my balls off if I had spent above our means....Like someone said earlier, it's our money....and that money would be great to put towards our wedding, honeymoon, down payment, student loans etc..

[edvedder913]

Like the first time? And 'we.' I have visions of two big Italians 'getting' the ring back..haha....and I thought the chick only gives the ring back if the engagement is called off, not after marriage?

LOL - funny but good vision. have you met NY PJ1?

i believe legally it works like this:
if he gives it as a gift - ie Christmas - she can keep it.

If it is given on a random day - he can get it back.

Get Right's a lawyer, he probably knows the deal - not sure he is here today...

[NY PJ1]

Like the first time? And 'we.' I have visions of two big Italians 'getting' the ring back..haha....and I thought the chick only gives the ring back if the engagement is called off, not after marriage?

he was married once b4 but that girl was a piece of trash as it turned out
we did walk into her parents house and take the ring back
she thought she was keeping it ..... wrong

[ryan198]

you've just summed up the entire problem! why should $$$$$$="extra special"?

first of all remember it's congrats to the dude whose getting engaged, seriously that's really cool. secondly to set a price on what is good and what isn't is kind of silly. through luck and connections i was able to get my fiancee an eternity band (diamonds all the way around) 3 diamond ring for our engagement for about $4100 (it's worth $7500 plus gold and diamonds almost always appreciate in value).

For some of you that's too much, for others that's too little. The point of the matter is that she saw a similar ring while on a trip with her best friend from college, and fell in love with it saying "I wish that could be my wedding ring" not ever expecting it to be true. As a grad student, money is not really flowing in at a high rate, but anyway I worked a few deals out and got the ring for the aforementioned price. The punch in the pocket was worth it for the look on her face when she got something she never dreamed she could have, that I got for her, and she gets to see everyday.

For a few of us that may seem shallow, that a physical gift could bring such happiness to a person, and perhaps that's partially true. Yet I think if you are giving a gift for the right reasons, and you have your heart and best intentions behind it why would you give someone a hard time for having a keepsake of their love even if you wouldn't do the same? On the flipside why would you put a price on what love means? Technically I was too cheap at $4100 b/c the ring was only 1/2 the price it should have been....sorry.

I'm happy to be engaged as I am sure our PJ friend's brother will be regardless of what others think, I guess I am arguing that we should just be happy for him and move on.